Family Drama

At what point are you running away from your issues because you're trying to protect yourself and at what point are you running away for selfish reasons? 

I'm not naive in the fact that I know that all families have their difficulties. The problems can be devastating like abuse or neglect ... or it can be smaller. With so many personalities trying to work together, it's unfortunate that they do clash. Without sounding too cynical, the perfect family doesn't exist and it hurts me to say that. 

I come from a divorced home, like many individuals. Realistically, this was the best result because my life before the divorce was a lot of screaming and tears. Now that the hard part is over  I thought the issues would go away. But I have so much bent up resentment and pain inside me as a result of it, that I can't forgive things that were said and am over critical of things that happen now. 

So I take myself out of situations. I cut people out, I walk out of confrontations. I never forget and I can't move on. 

Part of me knows that this is unhealthy. I should face my issues and share them with others. 

But then there's that part of me that says that it's everyone else's issue. I don't deserve how I've been treated. I should not be screamed at. So I should protect myself and leave. 

I'm so confused at what I should do. 

It sucks to go through this by myself and it hurts my heart to know other's go through this too. I hope that everyone can move forward in their own way. My deepest sympathies go out to other's struggling with family issues; I know it's tough. I understand that this might not be the best way to express my inner turmoil but sometimes people need to vent. 

Laters 

Birthday Gift Idea

This week, one of my best friends is celebrating her 19th birthday! This is just a little post to share what I got for her. Before you gasp in horror because I'm posting her gift before I give it to her, don't worry; she doesn't read my blog! 

Like most girls, my friends and I are pretty infatuated with the idea of England. Whether's it's the lifestyle, the language, the fashion, the people, the music etc. I speak for a lot of people when I say I want it all! For my friend's birthday I thought it would be cool idea to get her the union jack but add a twist.

My sister works for a flag shop (weird eh?) so I was able to get a really cute custom flag that my friend can hang in her room. Funny story: according to a quick google search, a pink union jack flag is the symbol for gay/lesbian pride in England?... Awkward. I'll be sure not to tell her about that little detail.

As well, what young person isn't obsessed with moustaches?! Since it is her 19th birthday (the legal drinking age in Canada) I thought a little shot glass with a moustache would be appropriate! 

Yes, we stole the nickname from Zoe and Louise! 

I wrapped it all in a pink bag and tissue paper, adding a tissue paper purple flower to make it stand out. (Overkill I know, but I was soo bored!) 

Hope you enjoyed this post and maybe you got some ideas! What do you think of the gift? 

Laters :) 

DIY Fever

Being jobless has given me a lot of time to feed my obsession of Pinterest and in return, create a new belief that I can become the next Martha Stewart. Pinterest has completely changed my perception of what I'm capable of. It's taking all of my inner strength to not jump in my car, rush to the nearest Value Village or some other junk store where I can buy all sorts of wardrobes and mason jars. (Seriously, if I get my hands on mason jars my day will be made.) Everything seems so do-able these days. And if I can complete some of these projects and save some of the non-existent money I don't have, then that's the best. 

I'm so excited to get to work! In September, I'll be moving into a new house/room for school so I'm super pumped about decorating it with all my DIY projects! I'll be sure to post all my conquests and fails on here, so watch out for them! 

Do you have any favourite Do-It-Yourself blogs or posts? Let me know, I'd love to here them! 

Laters!

Summer Lovin' - Sunglasses

Before every summer, I find myself buying new sunglasses because for some reason I can't keep a pair without breaking them. So this season I decided to be extra prepared and buy four pairs of sunglasses in hopes that some of them will last. I'm pretty cheap, (I'm not even going to lie about that) so it took me a while to collect this small collection but I'm fairly happy with all my purchases. 

 From left to right: Michael Kors, Hot Topic, Hot Topic, and H&M

I'm such as a fan of Ray Bans. Though these are from Hot Topic, they're still pretty good quality and only $15! 

Another pair from Hot Topic for $15, although this time they're Aviators. I love how the lenses are really reflective. (Don't mind me in the reflection) Super nice with a laid back pair of kakis and a white t-shirt, maybe even with some beach wavy hair. 

Michael Kors always makes a nice pair of glasses. Always. Although these were the most expensive of the bunch, they were still on sale for $40! Definitely found myself a deal seeing as most Michael Kors sunglasses sell for $100 to over $200.

Finally, the pair in the middle in this image are from H&M. I had to search through the sale section and found them at the bottom of the pile. They're okay; definitely not my favourite out of the group. BUT THEY WERE 5 BUCKS. So who cares if I don't wear them everyday!

So there they are! What do you think? What are you're favourite pair of shades? Let me know! 

Laters 

TOP TEN - songs for spring

Like I mentioned in my last post: ITS SPRING TIME! It's so beautiful out that I'm spending as much time as possible outdoors, trying to get a tan so I don't look so pale and sickly anymore! I usually create a playlist depending on my mood or what I'm doing and I thought I'd share with you the tunes I'm currently enjoying this spring! 

1) Pop Culture - Madeon 

     * Saw this guy when he opened up for Lady Gaga! You'll like him if you're into remixes 

2) Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (A Man After Midnight) - Amanda Seyfried (Abba Cover)
    * I'm still obsessed with Mamma Mia soundtrack. SAVE ME FROM MYSELF.

3) Q.U.E.E.N. (feat. Erykah Badu) - Janelle Monae 
    * Every time you listen to this song, imagine me totally rocking out in my room by myself. LOL

4) Get Lucky (feat. Pharrell Williams) - Daft Punk

    * No doubt that this will be the song of the summer, so get used to it! 

5) Lightning In A Bottle - The Summer Set

    * Try singing this song while driving down the highway! Addicting!

6) Us - Regina Spektor

    * I would love to make a video montage using this song!

7) One Night - Matthew Koma 

    * Love the sound of this guy's voice!

8) How Ya Doin'? (feat Missy Elliot) - Little Mix 

    * I get so much attitude and so much more sassier when listening to this song! 

9) Still into You - Paramore

   * I've always been a Paramore fan and even though this is a different sound for them, I still dig it!

10) If You Got The Money - Jamie T

   * A super catchy song that reminds me of Ed Sheeran and Jason Mraz.

I hope I've introduced you to a song or an artist/band that you haven't heard before! If the playlist is old news ... then sorry! All of the songs are searchable on Youtube; however, depending on where you live, not all of the songs are available on iTunes.
Happy Spring everybody! 

Laters! 

April (sorta) In Review

Happy May! 

I think May might be my absolute favourite month! It's that time of the year where you remember what the colour green looks like, birds are chirping, it's not that hot yet... I think I'm just a happier person this month. Like I'm sitting on my front porch writing this when two weeks ago there was snow on the ground!!

 I've decided to dedicate a monthly post as a simple recap of the previous month using my Instagram pictures. Unfortunately, I decided this a little too late (April only had four pictures!) so I thought I'd do a  year recap for the first entry. 

So far this year, my friends have been a staple in my life. Coming from a small town it was scary moving away to Toronto but I'm so glad I did it because I can't imagine living my life without them. Moving off to university really gave me the opportunity to pick the sort of people I want to be associated with. These pictures were all taken in the presence of my new friends and I can't help but smile remembering all the good times I've had! I now have a new appreciation for EDM, my vocabulary has completely gone down the shitter (irony!) and if I never played Monopoly again, it would be too soon.

To summarize, I've really enjoyed my year so far! Can't wait for more to come! Laters!

Collars, Collars, and Collars! Oh My!

I’m just going to go on the record and say that I absolutely love collared shirts. From the traditional collar to a Peter Pan collar, both styles always make me feel so professional for some reason; perhaps it’s because of the stereotype of businessmen and women wearing them to their office buildings? Although I do not have a job in an office environment (or a job at all) I love how any outfit can seem more pulled together with a collar. And I’m not talking about wearing a stuffy pencil skirt and blazer everyday (although I do love blazers as well), I’m talking about how you can seem effortlessly chic and romantic by adding a collar no matter if you’re working in an office or lazing around at home.

Burgundy/Black from H&M, Brown/White from Forever 21

These are two dresses I’ve bought in the past that both have the Peter Pan collars built in. Depending on the occasion, I can wear both dresses casual with just a pair of black leggings and cardigan. Or if the situation calls for a bit more put together look, such as a family get together, I can dress it up a little by not wearing any tights and curling my hair. Either way, these two dresses are staples in my wardrobe and I’m always on the hunt for more of them!

 Shorts, shirt and necklace from H&M. Flats from Forever 21. Watch is Marc Jacobs

As well, I often wear conventional collared shirts (not always so wrinkly though). This blue H&M one is one of at least a dozen that I regularly wear. To spice up the collar, I wear a fairly big necklace underneath the collar to make it stand out even more. Pair it with a bracelet or a watch and some flats that stand out and you’ve got yourself a rather easy and lovely outfit.

Both from H&M

Finally, sometimes you just have to get creative and add a collar. Either over a thin sweater or a dress, both these accessories would be amazing. Actually, it really depends on the outfit. I suggest trying as many different combinations to see what looks best.

A helpful tip: If I ever am unsure about what I am going to wear, I go to the website We Heart It and search other’s pictures. For example, if I knew I wanted to wear tights, I’d search ‘tights’ and just look at other peoples pictures that have tights in them. There is such a vast archive of beautiful photographs that I usually get inspired fairly quickly. Hope that helps!  Laters!

GIRLS

I've never been into the dramatic televisions shows. Programs like Pretty Little Liars and Grey's Anatomy are fabricated and over dramatized, in my mind. All I can think about while watching these shows is how come the characters haven't keeled over and gone insane from the terrible and crazy things that happen to them? Seriously, if a mysterious person was stalking me and taunting me all the while, I would have been inconsolable... like lots of ugly crying. 

Instead, I prefer comedy-based shows like Community, How I Met Your Mother, Modern Family and now GIRLS. 

Copyright HBO

Girls is a fabulous television show that follows a group of (shocker!) girls in their twenties. It is both funny and real and I couldn't be more obsessed with it. I managed to get through two seasons in 48 hours thanks to lots of Red Bull and dry cereal (my guilty pleasures). The show is written and directed by the creator and star Lena Dunham, a woman who I have grown to admire greatly. Not only does Dunham create such a marvelous show but she’s also an advocate for real girls. She's not blinded by the media and by Hollywood and for that I applaud her. Below is a quote from Dunham. 

 "It completely sickens me what our culture is doing to women. Last week I wore a big top and little shorts and a bunch of stuff came out saying I was without pants. 'The No-Pants Look,' it said. And I didn't go out without pants, I had shorts on...If Olivia Wilde had gone to a party with a big silky top and little shorts she might have been told her outfit was cute...What it was really: 'Why did you show us your thighs'?" 

See what I mean? This chick rocks.

Copyright HBO

It also shouldn't come as a surprise that Judd Apatow (my spirit animal) is producing the show. Apatow is known for being linked to some of this generation's staple movies and television shows such as Freaks and Geeks, Undeclared, Anchorman, Knocked Up, This Is 40 etc etc etc. 

The story Dunham tells through Girls is refreshing; it's real. The reason I laugh out loud while watching it is probably because I can image myself saying the exact same things the character say. In fact, I'm pretty sure I've said or at least thought half the things the characters have said. The characters are both likeable and unpleasant because they're so relatable. They’re like a more charming and funnier version of ourselves.

Spoiler Alert: One of my favorite episodes is when Dunham’s character Hannah and her gay ex-boyfriend turned roommate decide to do cocaine. Although I can guarantee you I’d never do coke, it was hilarious imagining myself partying with those two. It's not all peaches and cream though, (ps I don't even like peaches and putting them with cream sounds gross) there are a lot of cringe worthy moments from odd sex scenes to the harsh realities of OCD (i.e. when Hannah found out the consequences of sticking a q-tip too far into her ear). But that's what makes this show interesting. It's all real events.

Copyright HBO

I strongly suggest watching Girls. It’s seriously so well written and so funny that I’m hooked and am going through withdraws from my marathon. Also the soundtrack is worth noting with artists such as fun., Robyn and The Vaccines being featured on it. Let me know if you’ve seen the show or listened to the soundtrack and tell me what you think! Laters!

Diary of an Embarrassed Fool

I always remember my most embarrassing moments the last couple of seconds before I fall asleep. Right before my brain hits snooze for the night (or morning since university has ruined my sleeping pattern), all I can think about is the mistakes I've made and all the things I wish I had done. It's a constant cycle of self pity and regret that seems to turn faster right before I fall unconscious. 

I remember the moment when I opened my mouth and the brilliant comeback or witty joke I so masterfully thought up comes out in a combination of words and phrases that have no business being strung together. Or when on a spurt of confidence, I dared to take a chance and the only thing that changed was the colour of my cheeks as they turning a noticeable shade of crimson.  An uneasy laugh or a blank stare is sure to follow, then I have to uncomfortably explain myself to avoid looking and sounding like a complete lunatic. 

It's my life. It's a day-to-day occurrence for me and I'm fairly certain I'm not alone on this. 

I'm awkward. I'm socially uncomfortable.

Maybe it's because I grew up in a generation where typing and messaging holds greater importance than verbally speaking to a friend. Or perhaps I have crippling anxiety, which makes the very thought of doing something on my own sound similar to torture. 

Likelihood it's a bit of both. The mixture of the two makes it impossible to create a sentence without it being littered with "um's" or "like's" and is probably the reason why I avoid answering all phone calls.  

I understand that these moments possibly could help me 'grow' but for me they are a horrible reminder that I'm just a tad bit odd. Maybe in twenty years I'll look back on this first blog post and laugh at how silly I sounded. I'm a young adult who doesn't know how good I have it! I'll say to myself.  (whatever this it is) But at the moment, I'm stuck in a rut of doing awkward things while I try to avoid it. Ironic. 

This blog is a way for me to scribble down the jargon in my mind; a diary of sorts that not only is filled with stories, but ideas and dreams. I'm not promising much, realistically I would be pleased if you learned from my mistakes, but I do promise to be faithful. 

And at often times, very awkward. Laters! x